The Do’s and Don’ts of BBW Dating


Hallelujah! Decades of progress in breaking down social barriers and increasing comfort with sexual preference have made it okay for men to admit they prefer dating a BBW woman. Yes, some men admire the delicate skin-and-bones look of a haute couture fashion model. But others crave the luscious curves and softness of a womanly woman. They’re ready for BBW dating.

Or I should say…almost ready. Your BBW dating partner is not an oversized inflatable sex toy. She’s not a fetish object. She’s a real live person with hopes, disappointments, and feelings.

Turn your BBW dating experience into a love match by treating your partner with respect, tenderness, desire, and consideration. Here are a few guidelines.

DON’T STAY HOME EVERY NIGHT

bbw datingYes, BBWs like staying home, cuddling on the couch, and making out. Comfortable clothes, a glass of wine, something good on TV…sure, why not?

But if that’s all you ever want to do, she’ll put the pieces together and figure out that you don’t want to be seen with her in public. You are embarrassed for your friends to know you’re dating a fat girl. She’s good enough for booty calls but not for your friends to see, is that it? No thanks.

DO TAKE HER OUT

Take her bowling, for heaven’s sake. Out to a movie. Dinner with your friends. She’s fun and she’s smart and she has nice clothes she’s just dying to wear on a proper date. Treat her like someone you’re happy to be with.

DON’T SAY ‘I REALLY LOVE BBWS’

It’s great that you appreciate curvy women, honest. But every BBW has met up with men who fetishize round women, who don’t care who we are or what we think. They’re simply attracted to the way we look.

Yes, big boobs and a big round butt make your BBW date look ultra-feminine, more like a woman. Lots of men like that. But she’s a person too. Don’t reduce her to a fetish.

DO SAY ‘I LOVE THE WAY YOU LOOK’

That’s the right way to tell her you’re into her curves. Don’t lump her into “BBWs” as if they are all interchangeable. Just compliment her. If you like the way her dress fits or the way her pants hug her ass, just say so. We all want to be admired and considered desirable.

DON’T SAY ‘YOU’RE NOT FAT’

It’s great that you’re trying to make your BBW date feel better about her appearance. And she appreciates it, really. But when you draw a line between her and “fat people,” you’re revealing that you have judgment about people who are overweight.

When you say “but you’re not fat,” you’re not only denying reality, but you’re delivering an unspoken judgment on the unattractive, unhealthy people with no will-power who have let themselves go and become obese. You’re just trying to exempt her from your usual fat-shaming. But she’ll feel the shame.

DO SAY ‘HEY, THAT’S INTERESTING’

It may come as a surprise to you, but fat girls can talk about subjects other than their weight. Like other people, they have interests. They follow politics. They have favorite books and movies. And they may just be able to kick your ass at Call of Duty or Grand Theft Auto.

There’s more to your BBW date than her boobs and butt.

DON’T ASSUME YOU’LL GET LUCKY

There are overweight women who are so grateful for attention from a man that they will put out any time. There must be – because we all keep running into men who figure that because BBW gals are overweight, they must be eager for sex.

DO PAY ATTENTION TO SIGNS OF ATTRACTION

BBWs like sex and we love making intimate connections with our partners – just like everyone else. Just don’t reduce your date to a curvy body and don’t assume you know her just because of her shape. Treat her like a person and don’t be surprised if sparks fly. If she’s interested, you’ll know it.

WITH A BBW THERE’S MORE TO LOVE

I don’t mean to bust your balls. I just want to remind you – because so many men need reminding – that BBWs are people first. Meet your BBW date on that basis. Treat her with interest and respect, and she’ll be yours forever.

1 Comments

  • Frank Robinson (#)
    December 30th, 2016

    I’ve run into a whole series of men who assume that because I’m overweight I must be promiscuous – just like you say in the article. What’s the best way to deal with that? I don’t want to move sexytime off the table completely, I just want us to slow down a little, get to know each other first. I don’t want to feel like the only thing he likes about me is my curves. What should I say?

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