Whether you’ve been recently diagnosed with HIV and have a long-term partner you need to tell, or it’s been a while since your diagnosis, and you’ve just met someone cute, telling them about your status is key if you want to be successful at HIV positive dating for two reasons. First, trust is an important component of any healthy relationship, and if you don’t tell them, but they find out anyway (which they will), they might not be able to trust you again. Second, if they contract HIV from you without knowing you were HIV positive, you could find yourself with a lawsuit on your hands.
If the person’s viral load is detectable, they can pass on HIV during sex to others. On the other hand, if their load is undetectable, they can’t pass it on in any way. There are medications that can reduce the viral load to levels that are undetectable using laboratory equipment, but this doesn’t mean an HIV positive person should have unprotected sex simply because there are various STD-related infections that can result from it. HIV treatment is a form of protection, but condoms are a must if one or both partners have a detectable viral load. The highest risk of transmitting HIV is if an HIV negative person takes a receptive role in anal sex with a person with a detectable viral load. Vaginal sex also poses a high risk, but somewhat less so than anal sex. The risk is the lowest with oral sex, especially if a person with a detectable viral load performs oral sex on an HIV negative person. Knowing all this definitely open doors to various possibilities, but remembering that protection is a must is still crucial.
Despite all the treatment and information that is out there about HIV, rejection happens to the best of us, and the smartest thing is not to take it personally because it’s not a reflection on you as an HIV positive person, but on partners or potential partners who are insecure enough to turn you down based on your status. If your crush rejects you, just brush it off and move on because they’re simply not worth your time. You should also keep in mind that as a pos individual, you are free to browse variety of HIV dating sites that are tailored specifically to cater HIV singles looking for love and romance, which represents a good starting point for finding that special someone. Good luck!